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"English as she is spoke"


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A view from the outside, so to speak:

When I learned English - as a second or third language - I took it in as two separate ones:

  1. As she is spoke
  2. As she is writ
And nobody will convince me that the two have anything in common - and that's nothing to do with the plethora of different accents.

Just ask even the Queen to say this sentence: "It's counts for nought to plough through a tough trough though."


I would prefer not to see English dumbed down too much.
Agree; but it seems to be a far bigger problem that the English-speaking kids are being dumbed-down; the process must have started more than a generation ago, seeing how many mistakes even English teachers are making.


Gumpy: Not tying to be picky - but how many boyfriends do you have? Do they all own a car? Or is it your boyfriend's? :P

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english is bad enough but other languages get used regularly enough to become part of our common usage.


a personal favourite that pops up from time to time is this little french gem that has been murdered but the user just doesn't know it.










(with thanks to shop in the southern highlands)


my sides hurt when we mangle other languages.


don't get me started on cappucino....err.... i mean cupachino or is it cuppacino or the shitful mugacino variants.

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Interesting thread. Don't get me started on bad English, especially the creeping influence of SMS ("texting"). Now there's a new verb for you... ;)


One of my pet hates - and I have many - is the incessant use on TV promotions of "ALL NEW"", as in:


"Tonight - an all new episode of NCIS, followed by all new All Saints and all new AllBran ads"


I'm left wondering what alternatives there are - partially new? Just a little bit newish? Sort of new but not quite?


"All new" to me is the same as saying "Completely pregnant".


And one to give the purists a chuckle:


A sign outside a menswear (or is that Men's Wear? We know that Men Swear) shop (and this is true):


"Trousers slashed. At these prices, they won't last"


And has anyone ever thought about the alternative interpretation of the word "weeknight"?


In Scotland, that would be a little person with "Sir" in front of his name....

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As if "texting" was bad; at least there's a decades-old precedent. During the soccer cup final in 1966, I heard a commentator scream: "He pockets the ball and slams it under the cross bar!"

(That's when the Poms pocketed the Cup unfairly, aided by a partial Soviet linesman. Still not forgiven! :grrr: )


What has me much more bemused is the German adaptation of Internet-speak into their language. They actually created new verbs, such as "downloaden" and "simsen", fully integrating them and applying the regular rules of German grammar to put them through their tenses. Thus, "I've downloaded the link you texted me" becomes "ich habe den Link gedownloadet den du mir gesimst hast."


Back to English spelling.

Teacher: "How often do I have to repeat? It's 'i before e, except after c' - what do you say about that?"

Student: "weird!"


And what about the indiscriminate use of "their", "they're", and "there": their used interchangeably here and they're as if there spelling was a matter of personal taste.

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